Reviews

Haven’t heard of Johnny Action Figure? What? You live in a fucking cave? Well I hadn’t heard of them either but according to their MySpace, they have close to 2,000 fans. Wait... is it 2,000 fans or 2,000 friends? I think it’s friends and while I’m sure most of those folks are actually true fans, there’s the possibility many of them were duped into becoming friends because that kind of shit happens on MySpace.
 
Whatever. Johnny Action Figure is a five piece band from Reading, Pennsylvania. They play jangly pop rock, the type that reminds me of the alt-rock I used to listen to back in high school over a decade ago. Don’t take that as a cut to the band though. I used to listen to some pretty good shit back in the day (and even better shit now) and if I came across JAF in say... junior year, I would have thought I came across some golden ticket because when you’re that age and find a decent, relatively unknown band, you think it’s only a matter of time before they become full-fledged rock stars and you can always walk around with the knowledge that you were listening to them “way back when.”
 
Now I get a lot of garbage in the mail, music I’ll never listen to, or music I listen to once, wince and then move to a certain shelf in my living room where it can collect dust. My wife loves that pile especially since she hates clutter. I don’t have the heart to just toss it in the trash though. These bands (and I use the term quite loosely mind you) put a lot of effort into their craft and although I won’t name names... they still have plenty of work to do.
 
I haven’t stuck Johnny Action Figure in that pile of dust collectors, and I don’t think I will. The album’s far from perfect, but Asks the Room to Please Stop Spinning will most likely get a grand spot in my prized CD collection, sandwiched alphabetically between Billy Joel and Kid Dynamite (or in between Jets to Brazil and Johnny Cash in my iPod). There’s only seven songs here and they’re all pretty good. Good harmony, good hooks, good melody, and very user friendly. There’s no off-beat rhythms written by music geeks who think they’re re-inventing the wheel, but really sound pretentious, like the equivalent of a distortion-fueled train wreck. Johnny Action Figure simply supply sweet pop gems, the kind you find yourself tapping your toes to. I wish them the best of luck. Maybe one day they’ll be rock stars (or college, alt-rock champions) and I can say I knew them way back when. Shit... I even think I’ll hit up their MySpace and add them. I’ll be a fan though and not someone who signed one day to find a new friend request.